Letter 176

My very dear and well-beloved son,

This is the last letter you will get from me this year for only one ship remains and it is raising anchor. This is only a repetition of what I have already written to you about my affection for you. Having sent you nothing but through love of your soul, you and I have only one thing to do which is to serve God in the state and in the way He wishes: that is evident to us. Perhaps you have been mortified by some points in my letters and you have thought I was uneasy about the affair we were discussing. I admit and have already said I was sorry but not anxious, but you have clarified the matter and removed my misgivings in the letter you wrote me by M. D’Argencon, our new Governor so that I am satisfied. Let us not speak of it again; let us speak only of advancing in virtue and in the ways of the interior spirit where one savours God and all the Divine Truths. It seems to me that I am still far removed from the purity that this interior foundation demands. I have discovered some of it but I don’t hold on to it because I am still attached to a weak nature, fragile and susceptible to earthly impurities. Ah, my God, when will I be delivered from this self, so unfaithful to the Spirit of Grace? Although fundamentally I wish for neither life nor death or when I try to speak of it my heart expands and dilates because only death will deliver me from myself- the self that does me more injury than all the things in the world. Pray to the Divine Goodness to deliver me in the way most agreeable to Him and best for me.

From Quebec. 15 Oct. 1657.
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